雅思英语考试中,很多同学想知道阅卷老师是怎样给一篇作文打分的,下面我们就一起来看看导师是怎解说的吧。
题目:As most people spend a major part of their adult life at work, job satisfaction is an important element of individual wellbeing.
What factors contribute to job satisfaction?
How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?
范文:Nowadays many adults have full-time jobs and the proportion of their lives spent doing such jobs is very high. So feelings about one’s job must reflect how an individual feels about his or her life as a whole, and because of this, job satisfaction is indeed very important for the wellbeing of that person.
Employees get job satisfaction in a number of ways. Firstly, a person needs to feel that they are doing valued and valuable work, so positive feedback from superiors is very important in this respect. A sense of fulfillment is also encouraged if a worker feels the job is worth doing because it contributes to the society or the economy as a whole. Secondly, when someone feels they are improving or developing their skills through training opportunities, for example, then there is a sense of progression and purpose that rewards a worker. The sense of belonging to a team or a working community also contributes to job satisfaction because colleagues help each other to enjoy their working lives. Satisfaction is also increased by a sense of responsibility for and loyalty to a team.
Of course not everyone enjoys their work. Hard economic realities mean that many people have little choice in the kind of job they can get. In some cases an employee is working in a job that suits neither their skills nor their personality. Some jobs are repetitive and boring, and labour relations may be poor and lead to resentment and insecurity rather than to job satisfaction.
However, even though it is unlikely that all workers do feel happy in their work, I think it is not unrealistic to promote more job satisfaction in any job. If the factors identified above are implemented, then any job can be improved and more workers can feel greater degrees of job satisfaction.
范文分析:
1、思路
本文的段复述了文章的主题(job satisfaction)
第2段回答了个问题(What factors contribute to job satisfaction?)
第3段回答了第二个问题(How realistic is the expectation of job satisfaction for all workers?)
第4段是第3段的补充
段主题句So feelings about one’s job must reflect how an individual feels about his or her life as a whole, and because of this, job satisfaction is indeed very important for the wellbeing of that person.
第二段主题句Employees get job satisfaction in a number of ways.
第三段主题句Of course not everyone enjoys their work.
第四段主题句However, even though it is unlikely that all workers do feel happy in their work, I think it is not unrealistic to promote more job satisfaction in any job.
2、结构
一般说来,在段落之间,没有特别的连接词,暗指后面一段在支持前面一段的主题句。
段落之间的关联词:
在第3段的段首,考官使用Of course, 表示切换话题。这个词可以理解为“然而”。
在第4段的段首,考官使用了However, 展示本段是上一段的转折,即论证的补充。这个词组可以理解为“尽管如此”
一般说来,在一个段落内的句子之间,没有特别的连接词,暗指后面一句在支持主题句。
段落中的路标词:在第1段中,考官使用了So来突出主题句。这个词可以理解为“总之”。
3、语法
这篇考官范文在句式上最经典之处就是充分利用了英文的“状语从句”,几乎所有的状语从句在这篇文章中都很好地体现出来了。
全文使用的长难句型如下:
If…, then…(条件状语)
because(原因状语)
… if … because ….(条件状语 + 原因状语)
When…,then…(时间状语)
…, so… (结果状语)
Even though…, …(让步状语)
I think it is not unrealistic to…(我觉得这件事并非不真实……双重否定表示肯定)
, and… (并列句)
neither…nor… (否定并列句)
4、词汇
a、必备词汇:(掌握核心动词)注明:()里的数字代表这个词在文章中出现的次数,因此在文章中使用同一个词,只要把握好度,并不会带来太大的影响。其他没有标注()的词在原文中只出现过一次。
这次feel这个单词创纪录地使用了5次,另一个improve也使用了2次。这再一次告诉我们,考官也偶尔会用重复的词,只是数量不要太多了。
Feel (5), improve(2), spend doing, reflect, contribute to(这个在之前的范文中,考官使用的是make contribution to), belong to, reward, help, increase, identify, implement, enjoy, mean, suit, lead to
b、亮点词汇:
A sense of fulfillment充实感, a sense of progression进步感, a sense of responsibility and loyalty责任感和忠诚感, valued and valuable本身很有价值和能够创造价值的, positive积极的, repetitive重复的, resentment不满, insecurity不安全感, superior上级、高手