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支招托福作文 | 学术讨论范文(11)

2024-09-02 11:12     作者 :    

阅读量:

  分享托福考试真题范文。每一篇范文都经由新航道专业托福写作团队反复校对,还有详细的范文批注、撰写思路解析和好词好句整理,考托人们快快学起来吧!

 

  完整版范文内容来啦

  Question

  Your professor is teaching a class on sociology.Write a post responding to the professor's question.

  In your response,you should do the following.

  -Express and support your opinion.

  -Make a contribution to the discussion in your own words.

  An effective response will contain at least 100 words.

  Dr.Gupta

  We’ve been talking about the process of starting a new business.One of the most important aspects of the process is staffing-that is,deciding which people to hire.Please discuss the following question:ls it better for new businesses to hire experienced veterans of the industry or to staff the business with younger employees who are right out of university?Why do you think so?

  Claire

  l think a company should staff a business with the most experienced employees possible.lf you’re starting a new business,you need people around you who know what they are doing and can get the business up to speed fast.Spending time training inexperienced people will slow you down.

  Paul

  l understand what Claire is saying,but if you are starting a new business you want people who are particularly enthusiastic and energetic.Who is better than a recent graduate to bring those qualities to the job?You would be guaranteed an ambitious hard worker.

 

  范文正文

  Although Paul’s idea is reasonable,I still side with Claire's perspective.Hiring experienced employees is more advantageous forstart-ups because these individuals typically demonstrate higher efficiency.For one thing,seasoned employees tend to work faster due to their years of experience,allowing them to accumulate practical knowledge and refine their skills.For another,individuals with extensive experience are less likely to make mistakes,as they possess a wealth of customer-facing experience.They understand customer demands and have a clear grasp of how to meet clients’needs.Consequently,they are less prone to errors,which significantly impacts a company’s operations.Even if challenges arise in their work,these seasoned professionals know how to address problems effectively.While younger individuals,such as recent college graduates,may boast greater energy,they can jeopardize the firm if they make mistakes,particularly in a small start-up that has a lower capacity for risk than larger companies.【让步状语从句+定语从句】Therefore,it is fair to conclude that veterans,rather than novices,are the ideal candidates for positions in newly established enterprises.

 

  写作思路和特色

  这道题是2024年8月24日的托福学术讨论真题。题中的教授问学生,对新企业来说,聘请行业经验丰富的员工还是聘请刚从大学毕业的年轻员工更好?Claire认为雇佣有经验的员工更好。而Paul却认为刚毕业的大学生更合适,因为他们特别有热情和活力,会更努力工作。

  本文的写作结构是“总论点+解释1+解释2+让步反驳”。本文同意Claire的观点,也认为有经验的员工更适合在新公司里工作,因为他们工作效率更高。这个效率体现在两方面,其一是经验丰富的雇员对业务更熟悉,因为已经工作多年,业务相关技能应该已经比较纯熟。其二是经验丰富的人更不容易犯错误,因为他们拥有大量与客户打交道的经验。他们了解客户需求,并清楚地知道如何满足客户的要求。因此,他们犯错误的可能性较小,这对公司运营的影响很大。就算他们的工作中出现困难,这些经验丰富的员工也知道如何解决。

  在写完两个理由后,文章又提到对方的观点。虽然年轻的雇员,如应届毕业生,可能会更有活力、勇于拼搏,但如果他们的工作出现问题,可能会影响公司利益。尤其是在抵御风险的能力较弱的小型初创企业。因此,我们可以得出结论,有经验的员工相比于新手更适合在初创公司任职。

  在论证方法上,本文虽然没有写举例论证,但解释部分的内容比较丰富,能把“提高工作效率”分为两个方面分别给出理由,也有一些细节;并考虑到了对方观点的利弊,展现出一定的批判性思维能力。

  在语言上,本文的用词能体现出一些同义替换(比如“经验丰富的员工”就有几种不同的表达),词汇虽然不难,但是比较准确地道。

 

  用词用语整理

  side with v.支持,同意

  start-up n.初创公司

  本文使用的表示“初创公司”的词汇:

  start-ups/newly established enterprises

  seasoned adj.富有经验的(通常用于名词前面)

  本文使用了多个表示“经验丰富的员工”的词汇:

  experienced employees/seasoned employees/individuals with extensive experience/seasoned professionals/veterans

  novice n.新手,初学者

  refine v.改进,完善

  customer-facing experience n.与客户打交道的经验

  jeopardize v.危害

  【让步状语从句+定语从句】

  While younger individuals,such as recent college graduates,may boast greater energy,they can jeopardize the firm if they make mistakes,particularly in a small start-up that has a lower capacity for risk than larger companies.

  这句话的主句是“they can jeopardize the firm”。前面的“While younger individuals,such as recent college graduates,may boast greater energy,”用让步状语从句肯定了年轻人的优点,其中的“such as recent college graduates”是修饰younger individuals的定语。后半句“particularly in a small start-up that has a lower capacity for risk than larger companies.”核心是in a small start-up,“that”后面的定语从句修饰了a small start-up。这句话使用多个从句,写出无经验者的优缺点,也同时写出了初创企业的弱点。

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