They say that love is blind. And that’s probably for the best. Because a new study shows that people who greatly idealize their spouses have the happiest marriages. For the first few years, anyway. The research appears in the journal Psychological Science.
人们都说爱情是盲目的。但也许这才是的,因为一项新研究显示,将他们的配偶大大理想化的人会拥有更快乐的婚姻,起码前几年会是这样。这项研究刊登在《心理科学》杂志上。
Most people mentally accentuate their partners’better qualities. At least during courtship. If we didn’t, who would ever tie the knot? But some folks take these fantasies to cartoonish extremes. Now, you’d think such people are in for a rude awakening when they realize they married a real human being with real human flaws. But this new study says it isn’t so.
很多人在心理上会过分强调恋人的优点——至少在求婚阶段是这样,否则谁还会结婚呢?但有些人将这些幻想过分卡通化了。现在你可以想象,当他们意识到走进婚姻殿堂的伴侣是个普通人,有着常人的缺点时,这些人的幻想就会破灭了。但这项新研究显示事实并不是这样。
Researchers recruited 222 newlywed couples and followed them for three years. They periodically asked the subjects to describe themselves and their partners. And they found that people who maintained the most unrealistic view of their better halves were actually the most satisfied with their marriage.
研究人员招募了222对新结婚的夫妇,跟踪调查了他们三年。研究人员会周期性地让他们描述一下自己和配偶。而他们发现,仍然对配偶怀有不切实际的幻想的人实际上对自己的婚姻更加满意。
When the honeymoon’s over, it could be that those who idealize their mates may be more likely to forgive the transgressions that arise when people are no longer on their best behavior. Whatever the reason, the study suggests that couples should exchange rings—and rose-colored glasses.
蜜月结束之后,当人们不再将一面展现出来的时候,将配偶理想化的人更容易原谅对方的错误。不论理由是什么,这项研究显示,结婚的夫妇应该在交换戒指的同时,交换一下自己过分乐观的印象。
—Karen Hopkin