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Some people think the fittest and strongest individual help achieve success in sport. Some people believe success is much related to mental attitude. Discuss both of the view and your own opinion.
这个题目
学生主体段写到: The ability of endurance, flexibility and strength, which are all physical abilities, is necessary for people, and if one wants to be the professor of an area, this is not enough, he must have good mental attitude as well. 好长的句子啊,好多逗号啊,,,,,,,, ▲ “which” 引导的定语从句插入句中,从语法上看没有任何问题。然而这个定语从句没有必要出现; ▲ “and”这个衔接词选用的不具有说服力;如果原句想突出 “this is not enough”这个信息点,应该在点明“physical ability”的重要性后,再用“but”这样的转折逻辑衔接,说明但单单有 “physical ability”是不够的呢; ▲ “professor of an area”出现在这里不扣题,也不符合上下文语境吧。 于是,教师选用了“while”的逻辑串联了两个句子: While physical attributes like endurance, flexibility and strength underpin the careers of all athletes, those who excel tend to have a sound mental attitude as well. ▲ 采用 “physical attributes like ….”这样总分的原则更符合英文习惯:先将多个名词间的共有属性找到,再加上 “like, such as, including”等引出列举的名词; ▲ 人称的选用上也可以帮助拿到/丢失扣题分了。“athletes”及 “those who truly excel”明显比原句的“people”及”professor”更为符合题目的要求; ▲ “underpin” 这个动词意为奠基,巩固;可以替换常见的” necessary”等形容词表达一个事物的重要性; ▲ 三十九期出现的“attribute”还记得吧,这期有了名词的意思,意为属性;尤其注意的是该词名词和动词的发音不同; ▲ “excel”不是指那个制表软件哦,而是动词:擅长的意思。 ★ 小总结 ★ ღ 衔接词还要依据句间的逻辑关系合理选用; ღ 在列举多个名词之前,要找到多个名词的共性,采取总à分的逻辑引出列举的名词 ★ 小练习 ★ 修改如下句子 Patience, persistence and courage are essential to succeed.