阅读量:
If a university wants to spend money on its dormitories to improve the students’ life quality,
which of the following ways do you think is best?
- providing a quiet room for study;
- building a room for physical exercise;
- providing a place for entertainment (for example, a place to watch movies).
题目为2019年3月31日的独立写作真题
三选一的经典行文结构之一:
A比B,A比C,A赢两次,选A弃BC。
It is a misconception that college students can be soaked in [动词词组:“沉浸于”] the pleasure of living a campus life and thus barely have expectations of the quality of their dormitories. Instead, it is exactly because their dorm life is satisfactory [原因状语从句被强调]that they have a good time on campus. If a university has some money and intends to spend the money on providing a better dorm life for the students, it is advisable that the university use the money to build a room for quiet study. [难得的较大篇幅的开头段落,是一种临场选择,不是必要。]
[The first段:A比B] This room is certainly more desirable than a room for physical exercise or a room for leisure. Here comes the first reason. There must be a sport center where students can go to for physical exercise. In fact, most universities has a quite large complex that includes a gym and an indoor multi-functional sport court and a number of other features. If a student wants to sweat, the sport center is where to go. At this point, some may immediately point out [让步在这里出现] that students may, likewise, visit the library if they want to study. However,does a student need to exercise through the night? [反问句] If a student is desperate to burn some calories, he or she can do the night run outside (on campus for safety). However, can a student who is eager to study go outside and read under the street lamp? [反问句] Also, students can dofitness training [“运动健身”] in noisy surroundings. Quietness is however required for another student who tries to read. When the dorm mates lift weights or run on a machine and make noises in a nearby room (we cannot assume that the dorm building has space for the gym to be far enough from dorm rooms or that [注意宾语从句的平行] the room is absolutely sound-proof), the quietness is impossible.
[第二段要:A比B] Likewise, the recreational [形容词:“休闲性的”]room, for movie-viewing as a possible use, has the problem of noise too. [如果还是需要讨论到“噪音”,而前面又有相关的讨论,那么,这里就干脆一句话了事] Although there is no need to repeat the noise problem, [重复的理由就不赘述了] it is necessary for us to be clear that we do not ask students to go out for a movie during the late night. It certainly is not as safe as staying in the dormitory. However, students can always use their computers to watch a film rather than visit a cinema. If the shared pleasure is wanted, a couple or a group of them can squeeze [动词:“挤”] in one room. Isn’t it cozy in cold weather? [反问句] Also, isn’t it nice that some other dormmates read in the room for quiet study while they watch films, play pool or sing karaoke and howl with hearty laughter [习语词组:“放声大笑”] ?
[行文中呈现出的一个的措辞特点是:多次(4次)反问句]
At this point, I think we should expect the money to be spent on providing a quiet room for the purpose of study. In comparison, other propositions are hardly persuasive. [结尾可以短小、笼统、空泛。当然,我们也会看到篇幅略大、信息略丰富的结尾段落。]
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